


and I just can't resist you

by thekaidonovskys



Series: After the Drift [7]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, M/M, Slight Uncertainty, Touchy-Feely
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-28
Updated: 2014-07-28
Packaged: 2018-02-10 17:55:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2034519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekaidonovskys/pseuds/thekaidonovskys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shared space truly becomes shared space; it’s not just a common area, now, but a place they can both occupy at the same time, and gladly. And there’s never a time when they’re not a few feet from one another that one of them isn’t automatically reaching out for contact - which is always, always returned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	and I just can't resist you

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted by Tumblr user thekaidonovskys

Once Hermann knows it’s okay to initiate physical contact, he does it all the time. 

Okay, well, not  _all_ the time. They still have to work, after all, and sometimes they still need their own space and there are certainly still times when it’s not appropriate to be joined at the hip, and etcetera. So it’s not all the time. 

It’s a hell of a lot more than Newt’s ever expected though. Because Hermann’s always, for as long as Newt’s known him, been all about his personal space. Especially back at the Shatterdome, where dividing the lab in half, going to lunch at times when there were less people so he didn’t have to squish up on a bench with others and being particularly uncertain any time Newt forgot the boundaries and put a hand on his shoulder or something equally innocent, were all  _normal._ Newt’s known since day one that Hermann’s not tactile.

Except that kinda isn’t true at all. It’s just that Hermann’s tactility has to be self-initiated, nurtured and reassured, to a point where it’s easy and natural.

And then once it is, it doesn’t stop.

Whenever they walk anywhere, Hermann will either take his hand or curl his free arm around Newt’s elbow. He’s also slowly begun shifting his centre of gravity, to the point where his cane is often hardly needed, and Newt’s pretty sure he’s barely aware of what he’s doing. Or he just does a really good job of pretending. It’s hard to tell sometimes. 

To Newt’s joy, Hermann loves kissing. And to Newt’s sheer surprise, Hermann has no qualms about kissing him in front of others - more often than not it’s just on the cheek, but it still brings a smile to Newt’s face every time it happens. They’ve never gotten to the point of actually engaging in PDA, but there have already been a few close late-night calls when they’ve been trying to say goodnight and taking a bit too long about it (and then usually ending up inviting the other in anyway). It’s not Newt’s fault that Hermann knows how to do something with his tongue that is downright  _dirty_. 

They work closer now. Lab boundaries are still a thing, and work is still important, but if they’re debating ideas or sharing findings, they no longer do it from opposite sides of a lab. Instead they’ll usually pull up the couch and Hermann will promptly curl himself around Newt (“Simply to get a better look at the page, Newton, you know my short-distance vision is not the best.”) and rest his head on his shoulder. Newt, always amused by how quickly Hermann can drop his professional boundaries, strokes his arm or messes with his hair as they talk. As it turns out, they’ve had some of their best ideas this way, so it’s certainly useful - though often difficult to explain to coworkers who think they’re walking in on something entirely different. 

Shared space truly becomes shared space; it’s not just a common area, now, but a place they can both occupy at the same time, and gladly. And there’s never a time when they’re not a few feet from one another that one of them isn’t automatically reaching out for contact - which is always, always returned. 

But the best thing about it is definitely nighttime. 

They don’t have a great deal of sex - at least not compared to other relationships Newt’s been in, where the first few months are just a whirlwind of passion and experiments and ultimately exhaustion. They can’t, for one, not with Hermann’s leg, which tends to need a couple of days between any particular exertion and often simply can’t handle some of Newt’s wildest fantasies. And considering they’d been in a war for the past ten years in which not a lot of sex was being had, Newt finds he just doesn’t have the energy to jump from having no sex to having sex eight or nine times a week. Hermann, who’s never had much in the way of relationships even before the war, finds the idea of that much sex a little horrifying anyway.

It’s okay, though, because as it turns out the nights that they don’t have sex are often the best. 

And tonight is one of them.

They’re lying facing one another, inches apart. Hermann has one leg tucked between Newt’s - again, entirely non-sexual, but the best way to keep his bad leg steady when they’re lying like this. He’s got one hand cupping Newt’s cheek, thumb tracing endlessly across his cheekbone, and his other tracing patterns up Newt’s arm, which is curled around his waist. Hermann’s watching him, barely blinking, and Newt, usually a little flustered under so much attention, returns it evenly. 

They haven’t spoken for awhile, but Hermann now draws a little closer - which should be impossible at this point, honestly - and kisses him lightly. Newt smiles when they break apart, knowing that was the words Hermann can’t quite bring himself to say; because for all of the tactility and touching, he still struggles to actually vocalize much of his emotions. 

Newt gladly takes that role, even if he’s pretty bad at it himself. “This is probably my favourite thing in the world,” he says. 

Hermann smiles. “Oh? Better than being elbows deep in entrails?”

“Hm, let me think…” They both laugh, quiet and gentle, and Newt shakes his head. “Much better than entrails,” he says. “Better than… chocolate.”

Hermann raises an eyebrow. “I’m impressed.”

“You should be. In fact, the only thing that could make this better is chocolate. Any nearby?”

“Afraid not.”

“Oh well. Guess it’s just you then - but you’re sweet enough as it is.”

“ _Corny_ , Newton,” Hermann complains, but his smile says otherwise. He thinks for a moment and Newt lets him, knowing something good is about to emerge. And sure enough; “This is better than finding a book that was produced in the golden ratio.”

Newt chuckles. “You sure know how to be seductive, Herms.”

“I do try. And I must have succeeded somewhere along the line - you’re here.”

“I’m pretty sure that was my good looks and charm just being too much for you, and you throwing yourself at me.”

Hermann snorts. “Believe what you will, love. Who showed up at my room at 2am after the Drift?”

“Only because I knew you were pining for me.”

“Please. I was enjoying the quiet - my mind was still reeling from Drifting with your chaotic brain.”

“You loved it. You’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

Hermann’s quiet for a second. “I would, yes,” he agrees.

And they’re full circle - gentle banter always leads back to plain gentleness. “Me too,” Newt agrees. “I love being close to you - obviously,” he adds, drawing Hermann closer still. “In fact, I retract my statement about chocolate. The only thing that would make this better would be being in your mind.”

“You don’t need to be. I think you know what I’m thinking.”

Newt does, and knows his own mind is echoing the same. He kisses Hermann, this time for longer but still just as soft and sweet. “I love you,” he says. 

“I love you too. But may I ask a question?”

“Of course you can.”

“Am I… am I doing this right?”

Newt frowns. “Doing what right?”

Hermann lifts his hand from Newt’s arm and gestures at them both. “This. Us. Being close and affectionate. Is it… it’s okay?”

“Okay? Of course it’s okay, Hermann. Did you think it wouldn’t be?”

“I don’t have much experience to go on.”

Newt stares at him. “But… you said I wasn’t your first -“

“You’re not,” Hermann says quickly. “I have had other partners but not like… this. Touching was reserved for sex - anything more was too frightening for them.”

“Why?”

Hermann smiles and it’s wry. “They were afraid of hurting me. And in the end - because sometimes it _would_  hurt, sometimes they couldn’t avoid it or something that had been fine last time wasn’t so good the next - in the end it was easier to let them stay hesitant and distant. It hurt them less.”

Newt has to kiss him there and then because  _god_  that hurts to hear. “But you were stuck not being touched,” he says. “Not being cared for or cherished or loved or… god, Hermann. I’m sorry.”

This time his smile is more genuine. “It’s okay. Those relationships are years ago, and none meant as much as this does. But I wanted to be certain that this was mutually satisfying.”

“Insanely so,” Newt assures him. “Completely - this is perfect. I would’ve thought that you’d had heaps of relationships like this, you’re so comfortable with this sort of thing.”

“I’m comfortable with  _you_ ,” Hermann corrects. “The rest comes naturally.”

Newt smiles. Then frowns. “Hey, but am I - I mean, do you get what you need, affection wise? Do I treat you right?”

“You more than make up for any lack of affection of the past,” Hermann says gently. “You make me feel… well, you said it before. Cherished.”

“Good. You deserve to be. And you’re always honest with me about your leg, anyway, right?”

“Always. It helps that you’ve seen and understood how it feels. I swear that sometimes you know before I do if there’s going to be a problem.”

“I’m used to knowing when I’m about to do something to annoy you,” Newt teases.

Hermann smiles. “Yet you still interrupt right when I’m at my most crucial calculations to ask my opinion on the colour of a  _kidney_.”

“And I was right, wasn’t I? It wasn’t normal.”

“You’re the biologist, love. If you need to rely on a mathematician to back up your work, you may wish to rethink your field of expertise.”

Newt kisses him silent. It’s a typical end to their night. 

**Author's Note:**

> There's enough analysis floating around Tumblr about how comfortable these two were with touch before they so much as Drifted. I can only imagine what it'd be like after.
> 
> Title from "Untouched".


End file.
